Tag Archives: Islam

Marry Women of Your Choice, Two or Three or Four

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I have this question roaming in my head for some time already, and it is for my revert sisters in Islam, those who I know or am somehow in contact with, so mainly Czech girls, but feel free to add your own bit into the discussion even if you’re a born Saudi Muslim and have no idea who am I.
Many of you, no offense intended! (describing purely my personal feelings), are on some kind of righteous crusade to point out the bad stuff on The Others, and in favour of omnipresent “reminders“, many of you spread the feeling of self-voted haraam & halaal police, especially when it comes to social media, be it Twitter, Facebook, or common blogging under any platform, self-hosted or not (from which all are basically quite non-Islamic to the bits), and spread the feeling that once you’ve spoken Shahada you’re on the right path and can’t step off, no matter what will be put in your way, and the other sisters around you keep on stepping in bad stuff and you have to, because you care of their immortal souls, of course, you have to correct them, straighten them, lead them. And God forbids if they keep on going that way, than you’re probably going to link their post or blog and slander them and diss them, together with few others of the same thoughts, because, astaghfirullah , these people of other opinion surely aren’t Muslim (enough).
Now, I admire your dedication, sisters; and I am amazed how many people literally turned 180 degrees from their previous lives, leading a good life, set in stone by rules and musts and to-dos and some rights; but sisters, where did your spirituality and faith go in all that Islam you tend to preach? Faith has many faces, as many as its believers, and to quote one of my favourite things: The way I see it isn’t necessarily the way You see it. Hence thanks in advance for all your reminders, but please, keep them on minimum, and only in best thought – not to show you’re better or more knowledgeable, because that tends to make me just prove you wrong.
Plus, an (unasked for) reminder for you all, or even few just to put my point straight: Do not call others kuffar / kafir, unless you want to speak of yourself in that manner first.
An-Nisa, 94: “O ye who believe! When ye go abroad in the cause of Allah, investigate carefully, and say not to any one who offers you a salutation: “Thou art none of a believer!”
“O’ creature of Allah, do not be quick in exposition anyone’s sin for he may be forgiven for it, and do not feel yourself safe even for a small sin because you may be punished for it.” (Imam Ali, a.s.)
“Tolerance is a shelter against poverty.” (Imam Ali, a.s., Sermon of Wasila)
An-Nisa, 124: ” If any do deeds of righteousness,- be they male or female – and have faith, they will enter Heaven, and not the least injustice will be done to them.”
“The best form of devotion to the service of Allah is not to make a show of it.”
(Imam Ali, a.s.)”
Al-Tawba, 10: “But, if they repent, establish regular prayers, and practise regular charity,- they are your brethren in Faith. “
Al-Baqara, 85: “Then is it only a part of the Book that ye believe in, and do ye reject the rest? but what is the reward for those among you who behave like this but disgrace in this life?- and on the Day of Judgment they shall be consigned to the most grievous penalty. For Allah is not unmindful of what ye do. “
First of all I want to let you know that this entry, nor the question, aren’t meant in a bad way. I’m purely curious. By above paragraphs I do not intend to harm or offend anyone, I am only describing, how I sometimes feel in the particular community. I try to avoid judging other people and consider myself as a fairly tolerant, liberal Muslim, open-minded even, and I have no problem reading and studying other streams of thoughts, be it Sunni, Sufi, Christian, Buddhist, Taosit, whatever – it’s good to know things, or as my husband would say, it is good to know thy enemy.
Imam Ali (a) said: “A person setting forth for the acquisition of knowledge is like the one who struggles in the way of God.” (Al-Majlisi, Bihar al‑Anwar, vol. 1, p. 179)
My question, however, aims at your feelings, the true ones, the ones you didn’t adapt by reverting/converting/embracing Islam, and it’s aiming particularly for your hearts as women – please, in you answer, if you chose to answer me, that is, be really sincere with yourself, be honest with me and God, nobody will judge you here. Well, I won’t for sure, can’t speak for The Others, naturally.
My question for all you sister Muslimas (Mormons can join too!) sounds:

“Are you accepting (happily) the fact that your husband can and will marry a second wife? Third and fourth?”

Please, people, answer at your best mind. Do not lie to me, as I have my own opinion already and if you lie it won’t do any good to your own soul and won’t change anything when it comes to me, and do not answer with “My husband won’t ever marry a second wife, because…” – I’m not interested in that; I’m interested in your honest answer on quite a theoretical question (or in few cases a very real one), IF your husband decides to marry other woman, and you will be forced to share your feelings, your kitchen, your time, your life, your bed, your beloved husband with her – or them.
Thank you in advance for helping me with this “research” of a kind.


An-Nisa, 3: “If ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly with the orphans, Marry women of your choice, Two or three or four; but if ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one, or (a captive) that your right hands possess, that will be more suitable, to prevent you from doing injustice.”
An-Nisa, 129: “Ye are never able to be fair and just as between women, even if it is your ardent desire: But turn not away (from a woman) altogether, so as to leave her (as it were) hanging (in the air). If ye come to a friendly understanding, and practise self-restraint, Allah is Oft-forgiving, Most Merciful. “
Honor Your Wives

Stuck Waiting

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Days flow like a sand through my fingers, all same, a copy & paste of each other now – Ramadan always changes the whole tempo of life, but being in Czech and alone changed it a lot. Well; it’s my first fasting in Czech Republic and besides the fact that I’ll probably eat a cow at once when I come back home (no halal meat nearby at this forgotten place), the summer days here are pretty long, understand, the light period of a day is damn long and thirsty; and yes, indeed I’m not physically alone, since I’m with my parents and sometimes with my bro and his GF here as well (who smirk very childishly at any mention of Muslim, Islam, or fasting – gosh, who of the sane mind would ever starve and thirst himself just to prove something as mere as self-discipline, and for so silly reasons such as the love of God! – but hey, I’m getting used to it again, the omnipresent misunderstanding and misconception of what I do believe in, not quite mentioning the fact that who believes in any kind of God or Greater Power in this country is deemed as completely nuts and weak. Dooh.).
So I’ve set my mind and body on sleeping late, getting up late, not biting my daughter in her butt when she’s innocently stuffing a doughnut under my nose throughout the course of the day, not swearing (hard sometimes!, I’m quite a bad mouth), and trying to invent telepathy or even better teleportation. One is obvious, second to put an annoying thought in the head of any officer handing our papers at the very moment, and that being that they’ve got to be done as soon as possible, yesterday was too late. Doesn’t work, so far, needless to say.


I’m waiting, waiting and waiting, for someone to finish it off already and let us back, because I miss my spouse so much it’s unbelievable, so much that my heart physically hurts when I think of how far apart we are and how long I didn’t put my ear on his chest and listen to his heartbeat.
Kiddo misses her daddy as well but due to the fact that she’s surrounded by rather new (to her) forests, meadows, rivers and inland summer and her loving grandparents, she’s not usually as sad and blue as I am. Which is good, ‘coz two depressed chicks would be rather a lot to take on.
So I fast alone and long after the closeness of my beloved one – yes, even now after years of marriage I’m still crazy in love and I can say I love him more and deeper than ever before – and hope that our jinnie took her holidays and I can see my obsidian-eyed, ebony-haired and kind-hearted husband before Eid Al-Fitr comes…